Category Archives: Film

Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man’s Chest (Spoiler Free)

I think average opinion on this was, “Eh, it was ok.” That about sums it up. It is also one of the most anticipated films of the year, and it is selling out like crazy everywhere. I got there 45 minutes early and the line was already insane. I imagine some were there a couple hours early or more. Anyway, I thought the effects were good, especially on the sea men, but the story never really got you that involved. Some action scenes felt a bit repetitive and long, too. Of course, Keira Knightly was beautiful, but that’s gonna be the same in any movie she’s in. What I’m most curious about is the second week box office drop, and how it will fair against Superman in the long run. Normally I’d think this would go away quickly, but since everyone knows a third film is on the way, they’ll probably see it anyway.

Edit: Pirates OBLITERATED box office numbers, smashing records left and right. It’s the new #1 weekend, passing Spiderman by over $17M. This must have also beaten Aquaman by a wide margin, so Vinnie Chase has gotta be bummed.

Superman Returns: Spoiler Free

Well, I liked it. I thought it was quite a spectacle. Of course, I am a comic book fan in general, and the character of Superman is just so hard not to like. Not everyone agrees with me, like Roger Ebert (2 stars). He makes some points about the characters being too subdued, more or less. I think if you come in without big expectations, you’ll like it. I plan on seeing it a second time in IMAX 3D, which has to be the biggest hit for IMAX ever. The one IMAX theatre in the Phillipines is booked solid until the end of this month! It will probably be in your local IMAX theatre for the next 2 months, at least.

That said, IMDB has some pretty amazing trivia about casting and direction. For those who don’t know, while the budget was $220M to film it, Warner Bros. spent $40M before filming to get it developed. Many different actors, directors, and writers were considered during this period, which lasted almost a decade. I’ve decided to grace you with my opinion on those in the running, and how the movie could have been vastly improved or run into the ground if they were involved.

Continue reading Superman Returns: Spoiler Free

The Ice Harvest

Just saw The Ice Harvest, and I have to give it a pass. It’s a film noir/dark comedy, but it’s too much dark and not enough comedy. For a good, relatively modern film noir, try Body Heat or LA Confidential. For dark comedy, try Army of Darkness or Shaun of the Dead.

The Mission to Relax

The following are actual foreign titles for the movie RV:

  • U.K.: RV: Runaway Vacation
  • Taiwan: The Mission to Relax
  • Spain: Vaya Vacaciones (“What a Vacation”)
  • Other Spanish-speaking countries: Crazy Vacation
  • France, Switzerland and Belgium: Camping Car

I’m the Juggernaut, bitch!

This goofy video has apparently been circulating long enough to get a nod in X-Men: The Last Stand (don’t worry, no spoilers). Basically, it’s a bunch of guys recording their own audio track for one of those ’90s era X-Men cartoons. It’s not safe for work, due to profanity. Obviously the cartoon is safe to watch, so I guess it’s fine if you’ve got earphones.

Forbidden Planet: Spoiler-Free Review

Robby the Robot and Anne Francis.jpgI just saw this SciFi classic last night, as part of a double feature with The Day the Earth Stood Still. Experts were on hand to provide more information (including, unfortunately, spoilers). I had never seen it before, but now agree it definitely deserves it’s status as classic SciFi. It was a big budget film back in ’56 ($1.2M), so the sets look great, esp. on that Technicolor film.

Even better looking is Altaira, played by Anne Francis . The 50’s were a great time for objectifying women, and Anne Francis was definitely worth the effort. She runs around the entire movie in ultra-flimsy micro-miniskirts and bare feet, pretty much just like the photo (although her hair is much blonder int the film). In fact, according to Wikipedia, she helped launch the miniskirt craze. It’s no stretch that Commander Adams (Leslie Nielsen) and his crew (all male, average age 24.6) are comically falling for Anne’s naive character. Nielsen, who’s almost unrecognizable to someone who knows him from his Naked Gun films created 30+ years later, does a good job, although we heard he wanted to play it cooler but the producers were against it.

And, of course, there’s the iconic Robby the Robot. Robby was built for Forbidden Planet, but has made many appearances in film, TV, and commercials since then. He also has the best line in the film, delivered when Altaira complains he took too long to arrive when she called him:

Sorry miss, I was giving myself an oil job.

“It’s Obvious” Episode 2: 2001 for Dummies

This is beyond any doubt, the greatest movie ever made. If we pitiful hominids are to leave something of value behind us to demonstrate our collective genius (after the Solar System explodes), a copy of this movie would qualify. It was made in 1968 and has not aged a day. You could view it today and its vision of Mankind’s future in space and beyond would stand up to scrutiny.

The spoilers will follow; if you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favor and watch the DVD until you can get to the Cinerama Dome for a big-screen showing (they have them every other year). And don’t forget to sit in the very front row, center seat at the theatre; you’ll be immersed in a psychedelic journey beyond your wildest CGI-addled dreams.

PS. When I talk about the Monolith I am referring to that big, black, rectangular piece of ebony artwork that makes an appearance throughout the film. And yes, I’ve seen the Monolith written with a capital “M” for reasons that will appear in the review that follows.l
Continue reading “It’s Obvious” Episode 2: 2001 for Dummies

It’s obvious. Episode 1: “Narnia for Dummies”

Living in a world that constantly occupies and stimulates our minds
with color, sound, action, motion, etc. it occurs to me that many of
the truly obvious things in life are not being captured, stored in
our organic, transitory brains (What *does* happen after the brain
decomposes?? Where do the stored memories and abilities go?? I’ll
address that in a future thread). There are so many obvious truths that
have been learned, discovered, realized by CT members that is seems a
shame to let them go to waste into the thoughtless void of oblivion.

Which is why I am starting this series of ‘obvious’ articles. Given
my preferences, I’ll start with obvious movie facts. Mind you, these
are not opinions; these are facts which have been backed by the combined
might of the human mind and endeavour. If you haven’t heard of them yet,
then you are the perfect subject for the ‘…for Dummies’ series.

Since these articles may be full of spoilers, I will give fair warning of the
spoilers to come. Let’s start with the very popular “Chronicles of Narnia:
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.” If you have not seen it yet, it is now
available on DVD. Purchase the 2-disc set and avoid the movie-only set. You
will be very pleased.

[spoilers follow]
Continue reading It’s obvious. Episode 1: “Narnia for Dummies”