Articles by bladerunner

Bladerunner is using all of his engineering talent and hidden capabilities to advance the Gospel. So sue me.

Conservative Time-For-Tea

December 12, 2009 in Books, Film, Humor, Politics, Rants, Television by bladerunner | No comments

Time for a little break.  So much going on at work, you tend to stay away from TV, movies and popular culture.  But those who are blessed with a job1, however tenuously, should take a break and thank the Power-That-Be for the people responsible for these humorous asides:

 

Sarah Palin does a pretty credible job getting back at our old friend William Shatner.  If Bill’s reaction is genuine surprise at her sudden appearance, then I am even more impressed with Bill’s acting abilities !!  Someone really, really needs to get him in the Star Trek sequel quickly, before he joins Scotty and Bones in the big Starship in the Sky. 

Oh, and by the way.  Bill is a Canadian actor taking valuable Hollywood jobs away from US citizens.  Can someone get the immigration problem in this country corrected?  Too many Canadians are coming down to take our high-paying white-collar jobs in this country.   Forget the Mexican border; folks down there are coming to take the lesser-paying jobs and will not affect your six-figure, professional position.   It’s the Canadians that are the problem.  And they look just like you and me so that they are harder to find and deport.

However, good going Conan.   You are so good at this that I may start watching the Tonight Show again.  I stayed away for the last 15 or so years, but I think the Show is in good, capable hands again.   Can anyone tell me what happened to Triumph, the Insult Dog?2

Finally,  I just have to mention this item that I read in the news about poor Tiger Woods.  No more jokes, this is serious.   Here’s the excerpt in the news from one of his supporters:

“One thing people don’t understand is that we’re human,” Heat guard Dwyane Wade said in Miami. “You’re not born with a menu on how not to do things wrong. You’re going to make mistakes like every human being.”

Actually Dwyane, there is a menu that you were given when you were small.   It’s called The Bible.   Sure it’s old and seemingly out-of-date or out-of-touch.  It’s as old as Humanity, and it does seem to be in touch with the foibles and peccadillos that affect all of us, all of the time, since the beginning of time.    I don’t think Mr. Woods is the first person that has ever cheated on his wife; plenty of those stories in the Bible.  You may want to crack it open one of these days.

  1. I’m not implying that most bloggers are out-of-work, left-of-center hipsters with too much time on their hands.  But it is an effective stereotype. [↩]
  2. As I said earlier,  I’ve been away from TV for awhile. [↩]

President Obama and Hitler’s coloring book

September 4, 2009 in Everything Else, Politics, Rants by bladerunner | 7 comments

There’s been opposition to the President’s plan to broadcast  a “do well in school” message to the American student body.  In and of itself,  the message is probably harmless and probably a good idea;  who is better able to motivate our students than a good-looking, young President Obama?   Why are people making a fuss and opposing the president at every turn?  The problem lies in that it is being encouraged (some would say pushed) onto the American school system.

Officially, it is a voluntary program.  But we remember other “voluntary” programs like prayer in schools.  In that instance, any kids that refused to pray with all of the others were either ostracized or branded as atheists.   So I’m sure that any kids that opt out of the President’s inspirational message will be similarly affected.  I personally do not mind being branded a discontent at age 10, but it does affect your chances to get hired at the local hardware store for the summer when you turn 14.   That’s a heavy burden to bear.

The President should bear in mind other efforts to inspire young people without a chance for other voices to be heard.  This one-party messaging could eventually morph into something akin to Hitler’s propaganda machine.  One of their weirder efforts was this coloring book exhorting the Young German to do something that was probably decent and helpful.  But when a commendable exhortation turns into “obey my orders”  and “kill Jewish people”  then we have a little problem.1

Hitler's Coloring Book

Hitler's Coloring Book

  1. Just to make sure my message doesn’t get lost: Hitler was a bad man and killed a lot of innocent people.  We don’t want to be like him [↩]

We are Doomed… Part 2

July 24, 2009 in Everything Else by bladerunner | No comments

Here we are, back in the fray.  This time, we are discussing the arrest of prominent Harvard professor (of African-American culture) Gates;  he was questioned and arrested as he was trying to get back into his home after an extended overseas trip.

A diverse coalition arrests Prof. Gates

A diverse coalition arrests Prof. Gates

My credentials to address this issue, and why I’m a better commentator than the person holding the highest office in the land, President Obama, are here, in a previous post. President Obama weighed in on this issue and lent it an aura of importance and substance that it probably does not merit.

Let’s go ahead and dissect this one with our racial-bias-free scalpel, shall we??  Prof. Gates has just gotten back from China (14 hour flight) and is probably tired and just glad to be home. But then he notices that his front door is jammed.  Turns out his home was broken into during his absence.  While getting his front door unjammed, a neighbor calls 911.  So far this sounds reasonable.  Biased? No.  I would have called 911 even if only 2 white people or 2 white females or 2 white female models were trying to force my front door open (in the latter case, I would have gone in and joined them).

Police arrive and question Prof Gates.  Biased? No. The police’s job is to ask questions.  And there was suspicious activity at the front door, even if it was the owner of the house trying to force his way in.   Prof. Gates refuses to show ID.  Biased? Yes.  If he believes that he is being asked for ID only because he is black, he is mistaken. Period.  A good cop would ask for ID even if it was President Bush found in the house1.   Prof. Gates starts asking for the officer’s ID.  Biased? No.  We have a right to know our officer’s name during an investigation.  And don’t forget, the police are also there to investigate the previous break-in as well.  Instead of starting charges of racial profiling (Biased? Yes. Big time.) Prof.  Gates should have filed the police report on the break-in right there.  The police are a service that he and all of us in the community are paying for.  And yelling at the police is never a good
idea, even if they deserve it.  Showing deference, or at least cooperation to a man with a gun is always a good idea.  And don’t forget that you paid to give him the gun.

Mistakes made? Plenty, but mostly by Prof. Gates, from what is being reported.

Mistakes Made by Policeman:
Police should never walk into your home without being invited by the owner. They need a court order to come in unless you invite them in; there may have been some words issued by Prof. Gates that could be construed as an invitation, so be careful what you say.

Mistakes made by Prof. Gates:
The owner should never leave the safety of his home and follow the police outside.  You are giving up some of your rights by entering a public venue.  Don’t shout at a policeman and berate them in public.  You can show your displeasure by ammending  the police report and complaining at the station house. He should have started break-in investigation as soon as police arrived.  This really throws suspicion off of you, when you are aiding police.  And police are a service that you are absolutely paying for, so use it. Don’t bring up race.  But if your teaching specialty is hammers, everything around you starts looking like a nail.  Automatically bringing up race dooms us all.

Mistakes make by President Obama:
President Obama’s outrage is OK.  After all, Prof. Gates is a personal friend.  Any of us would  automatically take the side of our friend in a dispute against a cop.  I believe the words “rogue officer” were unfortunately uttered by someone in the fray.  But as President, Mr. Obama must put down his personal feelings and keep the debate cordial and race-neutral.  By quoting statistics that blacks and latinos are disproportionatly arrested (it’s true) he fueled the fire.  A President must weigh his words carefully and keep personal emotion out of his statements.  In this case, the arresting officer is clean and the President will come out looking badly.

Incorrectly regarded as a mistake:
Arresting a middle aged man that walks with a cane is perfectly OK.  So is arresting an elderly woman walking in crutches.  Or a teenager in a wheelchair.   All of these folk could constitute a danger to a policeman and any of them could pull out an exotic home-made weapon from cane, crutch, wheel chair.  A good ninja can make a weapon out of eyeglasses or a toothbrush2 so everyone should be treated the same way: handcuffs and extreme vigilance.   I remember from “The Fugitive”  that Federal Agent Tommy Lee Jones removes Harrison  Ford’s handcuffs once they are back in the squad car and offers him an ice pack for his wrists. I’m not sure if this is standard procedure, but I guess once you’re in the squad car you are more manageable and less likely to try to start a getaway attempt.  And the ice pack is just a nice touch from a really cool, tough Federal Agent.

In conclusion: Archangel summed it up nicely when he said that a tired, weary Prof. Gates probably reacted inappropriately when confronted with a stressful situation.  Also, the arresting officer has a super-clean background in racial sensitivity and even taught on how to avoid racial profiling.

Circumstancial evidence points to Prof. Gates being at fault.  But now that his friend Prez Obama has taken his corner, it will be difficult to find a reasonable solution that does not include the signing of a non-agression pact at the White House’s Rose Garden.  Such is life.

  1. Given our current liberal climate, has President Bush been cleared of from the initial break-in of the house?  I’d like to know [↩]
  2. this is a good topic unto itself, for a different article [↩]

We are doomed… Playing The Race Card

July 23, 2009 in Everything Else, Politics, Rants by bladerunner | 2 comments

Race relations are a big topic this year.  From the office of the Presidency to the next Supreme Court Justice to the selection of Surgeon General, race would seem to be a central factor in selection.  Not that these folk are not good, smart people; they seem to be good enough to do what their positions require.  But were they selected because of their overwhelming qualifications, or because they held some promise and they also advanced the color-blind American agenda?   Don’t get me wrong: it’s a good agenda.
Just witness the statue of Justice; it is blindfolded, ready to go into combat with that really big sword.  Another blind entity dispensing martial arts justice1.

Disclaimer: I am not a Caucasian, if that is even important.  Most dwellers of the Russian Caucasus region look nothing like your typical redneck person (sic)  from the Deep South. I could not pass for White, whatever that means.

But I have to take issue with the case of the alleged discriminatory Swim Club in Pennsylvania. Much has been made as to how a daycare class of minority students was run out of the club by just-awful white racists.  I think that the swim club is being harassed unfairly, by a day-care practicioner that has a chip on her shoulder.  Look at the facts, in a color-blind way: Was the group large? Yes. Did the group create a crowd that is unusual for the club? Yes. Did the crowding enhance the ability to swim laps in the pool or to enjoy a quiet swim? No.  Just for those reasons, I would have ended my contract with the daycare program: our facility is just too small to accommodate you.  There were 2 other groups that received the same reasoning for termination of contract; they are not making any waves (sorry, I could not resist)  about it.

Cute kids, ugly situation, flawed decisions.

Cute kids, ugly situation, flawed decisions.

But this one person decided that the swim club was too exclusive to be allowed to exist.  Exclusivity being defined as having the need to swim in a calm environment without 65 kids jumping into the pool. Trust me, I have small kids, it gets very loud.  So she took the comments of some of her students and decided to bring a lawsuit against the club.  Allegedly, some daycare kids heard others at the swim club make derogatory remarks, eg:watch the dark skinned kids or they’ll steal your towel and don’t they ruin a perfectly good pool outing.  Although I never automatically take a kid’s word above a trusted adult, this is what this unknown person did.  And now the swim club may have to close, since it cannot afford to mount a legal defense.

Did the swim club err? Yes.  They should have kept their contracts and notified members that certain swim periods would be crowded, since the club was assisting daycare groups that no longer had access to a regular swimming pool.  Did club members have the right to complain? Yes.  They had paid their dues and expected access to a swimming pool that was normally uncrowded.  Did they have the right to make racists remarks?  No. The club leadership should have used this opportunity to educate their members about life in the  20th, er, 21st Century.  Should they have used the words “[the kids] changed the atmosphere and complexion of the club?”  No. These are perfectly good English words,  but they do sound like the color of the kids’ skin had something to do with the decision.  Stupid word choice.

Solution?  Have the swim club institute racial sensitivity classes for members (including its President);  apparently they need them.  Have the daycare come back to use the pool and drop its legal case.    Contact between the swim club members and the general population is a good thing and would foster understanding between people.   But now  that the news shows have shown the swim club as a “bad” place and placard-wearing losers are using this as an opportunity to appear on those news shows (don’t they have jobs?),  this mess will move to its sad conclusion: the swim club will close and those very stereotypes that should be destroyed will be reinforced.  Oh yes,  everyone out of the pool !!!

PS> The daycare is seeking punitive damages against the swim club. I’d hate to think that the daycare program  is trying to shake down the swim club for money over this incident.  A lot of good daycare programs are receiving  reduced funds nowaways, and this may be a tragic way to raise money.  I will continue to think that it’s only the sad interaction between flawed people that has gotten us to this point.  That, and the eagerness of a lawyer to get some cash from (maybe) affluent people.

  1. remember the TV show Kung Fu? [↩]

Zoe Saldana VS. Sonia Sotomayor

June 6, 2009 in Everything Else, Film, Humor, Politics, Rants, Television by bladerunner | 2 comments

One is a prominent Latina female.   The other is trying to get into the Supreme Court. You be the judge as to who will have a longer lasting effect on the American people.

Sonia Sotomayor     VS.   Zoe Saldana

My vote is with Zoe.  She is from the Dominican Republic and is a living embodiment of the richness of African culture that came to the Caribbean and still influences the culture there. And she looks extremely hot in the Starfleet issue miniskirt and booties.  A worthy successor to the lovely Communications Officer, Lt. Nichelle Nichols, and I believe Zoe speaks fluent Spanish.

On the other hand, we have an outspoken, intelligent Latina female, Sonia Sotomayor.  She has been called a “racist”  by the right-wing but I do not concur.  From her isolated comments, I make her out to be more of a mysandrist1  But she is going into a Supreme Court slot that is being vacated by another liberal-leaner, Justice Souter, so her positions2 should not make much of a difference in upcoming court decisions.  She will be outspoken, though, so it will be nice to hear a strident counterpoint to the pontificating statements of conservative Justice Scalia.

My score: 

Zoe Saldana (1) for a fantastic Star Trek franchise debut.   

Sonia Sotomayor (-1) for inflamatory statements that were issued when she was not open to micro-scrutiny as she is now.   Once she gets coronated as a Justice, I’ll reset her at (0).     I’ll give her (+2) rightaway if she trounces Scalia at the weekly Supreme Court Poker game. 3

  1. Definition: a hater of males.  In this case, white males. [↩]
  2. Normally, I would now digress into  positions held by Zoe Saldana, but I’m not familiar with her record  : )  [↩]
  3. Always bet your hidden aces; do not try to trap or you’ll get your dream pair cracked by trip deuces or some such tripe [↩]

Angels and Demons: are they real? (Part 2)

May 14, 2009 in Books, Everything Else, Film, Rants by bladerunner | 1 comment

Well, the answer to the titular question would be yes, for if you believe in angels then you must also believe in their counterparts, the demons.  And of course if you don’t have a spiritual bent, then this whole article is moot and you can just skip it and go see the new movie.  I suppose this is similar to watching the Star Wars movies:  I don’t believe in The Force powering up the Jedi Knights, but it sure makes for an entertaining 2 hours at the cinema.

Angel or Demon?

But if you do believe, as I do, then let me get back to the discussion we started in part 1.  I am going to relate the first part of the argument that was started so long ago in the back of a church bulletin:

(Read 1 Timothy 4:1-5)1  This passage describes the great Apostasy that is to come.  Do you think the Bible teaches that Demons are active?  Why don’t we hear much about Demons here in the United States?

The scripture passage is copied here, for your convenience (verses 1-2):

But the Spirit explicitly says that in later times some will fall away from the faith, paying attention to deceitful spirits and doctrines of demons, by means of the hypocrisy of liars seared in their own conscience as with a branding iron,

Well, I think the Bible has tons of passages showing that Demons are active.  Even without a Bible degree, I recall a couple of times in the old days when people would foam at the mouth and throw themselves into fires, while under the influence of demons.  In today’s newspapers, there are plenty of stories of people doing similarly unexplainable things (like killing their entire families or trying to kill all of their co-workers).  So if the equation is demons = crazy behavior then we can safely say that demons are still active.  But why don’t we hear more about them in today’s world?? How come the angels grab all of the attention and show up in all the movies and books and holiday cards?2

 As I said earlier, if you believe in Angels, then you must also believe in Demons.   I believe that you don’t see much demon activity because we do live in a society ruled by science, which has disproven the existence of demons (if you could ever prove a negative, which a lot of experts believe is a lot harder than we think).  If our society no longer believes in demons, then you can be sure that they have a lot more flexibility to act in our daily lives.  If you have ever found  yourself in a terribly emotional state (rage, depression, etc.)  then who is pushing the chemicals and hormones around in our brain??  Could someone be pressing on your adrenal gland at just the right time??  If our bodies are masses of cells, what leads them to start behaving in some fashion that we have not initiated with our mind??

I’ll play the rational scientist and respond that our bodies have been conditioned to pump hormones into our bodies at times when our very existence is threatened.   Quick, get that adrenalin shot in your system so that you can outrun a woolly mammoth and survive to procreate another day !!  So when we are in a situation that demands action, our bodies sometimes respond inappropriately and send the chemicals flying into our bodies, possibly making us go cuckoo and go grabbing for the nearest blunt object, projectile weapon, etc.  But as I recall, we also have been programmed for “fight or flight”   so why is it that most of the time we take this 50-50 choice and go for “fight”  against our very loved ones??

Who pushed the balance to the side that drives us to want to ram our truck into our neighbor’s house because his dog will never quit yapping??  That’s the “fighting” side that’s winning.

I’ll stop here, but if you want to read verses 3-5 of the Bible verse go ahead.  It is even more apropos since it talks about men advancing the cause of Demons by spouting heresy3  or in the case of the movie “Angels and Demons”  by spouting half-baked ideas about secret societies and giving it the veneer of truth.  This is OK when a movie bills itself as escapist entertainment, but the film-makers have gone out of their way to give credence to the theories in the film;  this helps the box-office but it does not advance the cause of truth.    And you thought Chariots of the Gods  in the 1970’s was a hoot; this new film goes one better.

Angels don’t have a prayer when you have CGI on your side.

Stay tuned for Part 3:   Demons, a distressing spirit.

  1. This would be in the Bible, of course [↩]
  2. Beelzebub wishes you Happy Holidays — now there’s a card I’d like to send a friend [↩]
  3. In this case the issue was abolishing marriage and incorrectly having to abstain from sinful foods — more reason to skip the cheesecake tonight.  But go ahead and propose to your girlfriend; it’s OK [↩]

Doug Prasher - Nobel Prize Hero

April 27, 2009 in Books, Everything Else, Rants, Technology by bladerunner | No comments

Notice that I did not use the familiar phrase: Nobel Prize Winner.   That is because Doug Prasher is a victim of circumstance, Nobel prize rules and a slowing research environment.   You can read his full story here as provided by NPR, but the gist is that he was a scientist that provided a vital link in the research that culminated in this 2008’s Nobel prize win.  However, because his funding ran out at a succession of research jobs, he is now under-employed as a courtesy shuttle driver in Hunstville, Alabama. 

Courtesy Shuttle Driver and Nobel prize researcher Doug Prasher

But he is a hero, because he did the unselfish and ethical thing: he shared the fruits of his research with other scientists and helped them to get to the Nobel prize.  Heck, if the prize committee did not have the 3-person rule for awards, Doug might have found himself with winfall cash and an invitation to Sweden (do they pay for the airfare??) .

My advice to Doug: sell and write your story to Hollywood.  If they could make a crummy movie about the guy who invented the windshield wiper, they can certainly make a movie about your story.  I am hooked already, and have found your persistence and courage inspiring.  You are not only putting your kids through college but also providing a vital service in our community.  I can only hope that the added attention to your tale brings about a job offer in the scientific field where your contributions can make our economy grow (are you listening, President Obama??)

Now, the auto industry is slowing down; nobody is buying cars.   I hope this does not result in further unemployement for our hero; the auto dealership should trump up the fact that a Nobel prize researcher works there.  This could result in upscale clientele — people that don’t care if the new Toyota SUV only gives you 10 miles per gallon.  Better yet, someone hire Doug to invent a car that runs on hot air;  there’s plenty of that blowing around our state and federal government centers as they try to get their hands on our (and our children’s) money using the recession as an excuse…….

UPDATE: Our hero will be going to Stockholm after all !!  The Nobel prize winners invited Doug and his wife to travel with them to Stockholm and be at the ceremony, where he will be thanked for his contribution.   That’s how a real scientist behaves; kudos to all involved.   Now don’t get me started talking about Rosalind Franklin  and how Watson and Crick scammed her out of their Nobel Prize for their so-called discovery of the DNA double helix !!

Are Demons Real ?

March 21, 2009 in Everything Else, Film, Travel by bladerunner | 1 comment

With the upcoming release of the fictional “Angels and Demons”  (or as I call it DaVinci Code part deux) I have to ask the real question: Are there real demons??  Are they walking among us as seen in the movie “Constantine?”

Constantine battles demons

We have plenty of fictional film evidence to show these demonic beings (Constantine, again) but now I think we’ve had enough evidence in the news programs to proceed with a real discussion:


   * Alabama shooter kills 10
   * German shooter kills 10
   * Oakland shooter kills 3 cops.
   * and on and on……

Yes, I understand that out of a billion inhabitants a few people out of their minds is normal.  But what drove them out of their minds?  99.99999 percent of the population can neutralize the instict to kill their enemies/ loved ones/ strangers on the street,  so what tips these .00001 percent over the edge? 
My answer: demons.

And not the run-of-the-mill demons that make you go for that extra slice of pie for dessert or make you lie to your friends about missing their party last week.   I’m talking about the true evil that makes you contemplate flying yourself and a plane full of fuel into a building.  Demons that can literally drive you out of your rational mind and do something indescribable.

Some time ago I attended a church that printed a series of questions on the back of their bulletin.  These were questions that could be used to initiate discussions about ethics, morals, spirituality, etc.  Aptly enough, this section was called “The Back of the Bulletin” 1  For some reason, I was attracted to keep their discussion titled “Demons, Are They Real?”  but never got a chance to start this investigation.  The time for that investigation is now. 

Over the next few weeks, I will post each new question from The Back of the Bulletin on this blog, and hopefully a spirited (sic) discussion will follow.   Just to give you my background:   I’m an engineer and not attracted to the artifacts of the world beyond the veil (those things we cannot see) such as spirits, ghosts, demons, etc. I’ve never seen a UFO or experienced anything that cannot be explained by science, physics, chemistry, gaming theory. I do believe in God and therefore must believe in Satan.  For whatever reason, they both feel that they need entities to carry out some actions, so therefore I believe in angels and demons.  I don’t believe that demons make you cheat on your taxes or grab extra food at a buffet; these are behaviors that can be easily explained by our background as opportunistic hominid foragers more than by the spiritual world.

But when a rational person (and millions of years of evolution has resulted in a fairly stable brain) goes on a rampage, I have to believe that there was an extra spiritual push in there, somewhere.   I will discuss the mechanics of the brain and how it can be gamed to see/feel/experience something extraordinary,  but there’s been no proof that the deranged individuals that we are discussing were under the influence at the time of their terror sprees.  Sherlock Holmes would not settle on demons as the underlying influence2  but we may surprise ourselves when we start eliminating all other factors from the equation.

  1. Better than what you usually find there: Bulletin sponsored by You’re Next Funeral Home [↩]
  2. Eliminate all other factors, and the one which remains must be the truth. [↩]

Quantum of Solace musings

January 25, 2009 in Film by bladerunner | No comments

 I finally saw the movie and since it’s been out a while,  I think I can add a few spoilers from here onward…..

Vodka Martini, shaken not stirred

Well, the movie was pretty good, and perhaps it is because I went in with very low expectactions.  Yes, the title sequence was a little flat but I thought that blending the female figures into the sand dunes was very creative.  Half the time you thought you were looking at some pattern when there was nothing there.  Musically, it was also very forgettable. However,  they were brilliant in holding the 007 theme until the very end credits.  Part of my brain was in tension awaiting that musical cue, which did not come until the end.  This is a fantastic way of bookending what was obviously part II  of  “Casino Royale”  last year.  And it signals the start of the Daniel Craig years, which should be good.

The villains keep on referring to “our organization” throughout the film,  but they never reveal it to be SPECTRE.  In the end, they make a reference to Quantum, but that would be a bad direction for the series to take.  If they are going back to the classic Bond years, what is better than SPECTRE??  And the plot of this movie was perfect for the “extortion” part of the organization.  Bring back SPECTRE !!!

Good movies steal from the best.  This movie has echoes of “Thunderball” in the death of Agent Fields, the comely young British agent that dies while trying to help Bond.  And echoes of both “GoldFinger” and “For Your Eyes Only”  in the young woman trying to avenge a death in the family.  Excellent stuff.

Also, “Quantum” may be the first Bond movie where the ingredients and process to make the vodka martini are explicitly spelled out.  There may have been a reference to this unique drink in an earlier film, but I don’t think it was as detailed as here, making a nice counterpoint to the Vesper drink which was featured in “Casino Royale.”

Missed Dearly:  Our special armaments agent Q and his gadgets.  And some girls in bikinis,  this is supposed to be escapist entertainment !!!  If the writers can come up with an iconic villain that is not too preposterous in today’s realistic environments that would be great.  Maybe a guy with nanobots that transform him into an animal at convenient times1.

  1. Cybernetic lycanthropy, as Archangel has so succinctly put it [↩]

Obama Inaugural — A Pointless Farce

January 17, 2009 in Politics, Rants by bladerunner | 5 comments

Well, now that I have your attention let me soften up a little here.  Any Presidential Inaugural in the United States should be an occassion of joy.  In what other part of the world would you see the reins of government for such a powerful nation change hands so smoothly??  Bush is out and Obama is in, and not a single person has been incarcerated or worse.

Well, maybe I’m premature.  Given the low temperatures at the Inaugural and the fact that you have limited bathroom access and seating, you may yet see a few casualties of the new government.  A word of advice to our older readers: don’t go.  This standing around for 6 hours in freezing cold is for the young.

And it is the young that should be celebrating; they are the ones that put Obama over the top and elected him President.  In their excited fugue state, they are going to go and throw a fantastic party next Tuesday to celebrate the first African-American President of the United States.    But I’m here to throw a little cold water on your party,  a little dose of reality on the Change Band-Wagon that rolled so smoothly over the remains of the GOP ticket last November.   You voted for change but what you’ve been getting is pragmatism: your new President has limited options in the face of a melting economy.  You voted to punish the rich, but it seems that we still need the rich to kick-start the economic engine from its current stupor.  You voted yourselves a ticket to the opening of a cornucopia of endless green energy and bio-fuels, but instead you are standing in the soup line with the rest of us.  Better get out of the line and get behind the serving table: we are going to need all the help we can get.

The euphoria I expect to see next Tuesday reminds me of a fantastic wedding day put together for a couple that never gave much thought to what is needed to form a long-lasting marriage.  The couple was so focused on having a great time at the wedding that they did not plan out the rudiments of a real marriage: a firm financial and emotional foundation for the life-long effort that lay ahead. 

I have heard so much about the menus for the different Inaugural celebrations being held but not much about how folks are going to pay for the meal and the entertainment.  Is this money disposable income or is it coming from your unemployment benefits?  Is it worth spending a piece of your future to get a short-lived high?

This is akin to the feeling you get when your team wins a game.  For a few moments life seems wonderful, but it is a feeling that is built on a meaningless event.   Roger Ebert has a great article on the feeling of elevation  and how you get it at the movies: it is a great sensation but it is built on something less than reality.  When the movie is over, so is the feeling of elation.  It take a little extra effort to turn the memory of that moment into action that lasts a lifetime.   I can only hope that that is what will happen on Inauguration Tuesday.  Go get  your jollies that day, but don’t lay the weight of the future on Mr. Obama; only you and the hard work of a few million others can make it as bright as you are expecting it to be.

I love a parade–Stephanie Edwards is back!!

January 3, 2009 in Everything Else, Rants, Television by bladerunner | No comments

Sometimes, the Universe surprises me.  Karma balances out and all is well with the world.

I was pleasantly surprised on New Year’s Morning to find out that Stephanie Edwards is back as co-host of the big Pasadena Rose Brou-ha-ha.  As you may recall, she was unceremoniously dumped several years ago to the surprise of many traditionalists and to the detriment of the local KTLA parade coverage.   I covered the outrage here  and others also picked up this story.    Here she is, soldiering on under one of the few rainstorms to hit the Rose Parade (2006):

Stephanie Edwards in the rain.

But now she is back and her replacement was moved to the sidelines in an ironic turnaround that makes for gossipy good fun.  And for good measure, she returns to a higher-paying salary;  payback is a bitch.

Obama Wins !!! Break out crystal ball.

October 22, 2008 in Politics, Rants by bladerunner | 5 comments

Yes, Presidential Election Year 2008 seems to be over.  Or is it?? Read on.

With most polls placing Democratic candidate Obama 10+ points over Republican candidate McCain, it would seem to be a routine slide to November 4th this year.  However, I like to keep things interesting, so here are my top predictions for an Obama presidency:

Item 1: Obama wins. Duh.

But he does not win by the 10+ margin that the polls predict.  I believe that the contest will be a lot closer on Nov. 4th.  There will be a lot of Republicans kicking themselves in the butt for not voting.   Shame on you;  all Americans should vote on this Election Day.  The unexpected vote numbers will possibly be blamed on the Bradley Effect witnessed in the California Gubernatorial election of 1982 :folks did not admit to the pollsters that they would not vote for a black candidate.  When the election took place, the true numbers came out.  But this disparity in reporting vs. reality will result in……

Item 2: Media backlash. 

All of us are aware that the media was in bed with candidate Obama, eg: Saturday Night Live lampooned this phenomenum when they showed reporters asking candidate Obama if he needed a pillow or if it should be fluffed some more.  Candidate Hillary Clinton alluded to this “Obama Effect”  during her own candidacy.  I believe the American people will not tolerate 4 more years of this whore-pimp situation and will strike back against the media by NOT WATCHING.  Expect higher viewing numbers for reality-television shows and Entertainment-Tonight-type programs as news viewership declines.  Same for newspapers, unless they print sale-coupons or cents-off coupons for food.  Which brings us to…..

Item 3: Economy in the toilet. 

Despite Obama’s “efficiencies”  and his research into extracting sunlight from cucumbers1  the economy will continue its slide into crumminess or at best, into stagnation.  There will be an initial bump upwards, due to the change-is-coming effect, but this will quickly be replaced by the cold truth of reality.  Useless investment in ocean wind farms and solar panel cities will not trickle down to other sectors of the economy.  They will not produce enough energy to fuel an economic resurgence, but they will make for an exciting IMAX film coming to your neighborhood soon !!! 2  Which easily leads to…..

Item 4: Blame it on Bush. 

Blaming anything and everything on Bush has become such a popular pastime that I don’t think  it will stop.  Obama got elected by blaming the Bush Presidency and I don’t think he will stop.  Blaming the continuing crisis on 8 Bush years will get pretty old, though, and soon.  The Economic Crisis got him elected, but it will also bring Obama down in popularity and job acceptance poll-numbers.  There will be books written on this period of economic distress, which is why I find it so curious that none will be written about……

Item 5: Big Conspiracy. 

I always connect a big event with the people that most benefit from that big event.  This crisis got Obama elected, ergo, the Democratic Party is behind it.  Now wait.  Before you consign this thought to the rubbish bin section of your brain, consider this:  the crisis was bound to happen, the bad home loans were in place, the banks were running on vapor; but what made it happen just NOW??  Why did it not happen months ago, or on November 5th?  Why was it so fortuitously timed for a particular person to benefit??  Just the timing of it makes my conspiracy-theory-minded Spidey sense tingle.  And trust me, I am not the only person making this kind of fantastical leap: most reporters got their reputations by developing that investigative-hunch-bone that makes them uneasy when things “just happen.”  But the lack of investigative reporting makes me wonder about how far this conspiracy reaches.  Could it be that not only the Democrats but also the Republicans have something to hide in this mess, and they have both managed to keep the press at bay??  Newshounds know that you can’t piss both sides of the political process, or you end up with 4 years of reporting on Libertarian and Green Party issues.  But they can still redeem themselves and avoid Item 2.  It just may not be possible to do so.  Just look at the finger that pushed the first domino in the chain of bank failures, that’s were the fault lies.

And bonus Item 6: 

Obama’s ethanol initiative will pollute the environment in a big way and turn environmentalists against him.  Again.  But nobody cares about this, so please ignore.

Afterthought Item 7: Sarah Palin runs for Presidency 2012.  This year shows that inexperience is not a detractor to the Presidency if you are popular enough.  After discarding the McCain deadweight (sorry John!!), Palin will reject public funding for campaigns and go on to raise prodigious amounts of cash that will take her to the Presidency.  But watch out: her run will encourage Hillary Clinton to also run in 2012, capitalizing on her opposition to Obama since the very start; she will find an understanding American public.  That’s the campaign *I* want to see made into a movie!!3

  1. ”Gulliver’s Travels”, Jonathan Swift [↩]
  2. As an engineer, I am actually intrigued by these new power systems; they
    will look pretty cool but will not produce the scale of energy needed by a country the size of the USA [↩]
  3. NOTE to Spike Lee: we don’t want an inspirational Obama film starring Denzel Washington, unless Obama is running a secret war against extraterrestrials on the Dark Side of the moon, with lots of special effects explosions and USA space troopers launching out of the Capitol building [↩]

The Wicked Witch, Hitler and War Criminals

August 20, 2008 in Film, Humor, Politics, Rants by bladerunner | 2 comments

Quite a title for this article, but it really makes sense.  Trust me.

The Wicked Witch

I was listening to the soundtrack for the Broadway show “Wicked.”  It is based on the premise that the Wicked Witch of the West was really not evil, just a  misunderstood soul.   Wow.  They are taking one of the iconic evil figures from literature and giving her a second look, an alternate-universe history that makes her, well, nice1.   And that’s not right.

Taking this alarming trend to its pinnacle, could it be far behind for Hitler to make a comeback?? 

(NOTE: the following are satirical comments.  Do not mistake them for reality; they are just an artifice to make a point.  That is how satire works.) 

After all, Hitler was really nice to his dogs. And he did put all of the German people back to work on that really cool roadway, the Autobahn.  Did I mention that he created the Volkswagen?? That picture of Hitler and his gang of killers parading around on a convertible Wolkswagen has got to be the coolest, most disturbing image of the war. 2  So except for the 6 million people he killed, Hitler was a really nice guy.  Really. 

(NOTE: the satire has now ended.  Back to reality.)

Hitler’s Beetle

But we all know that the winners of a war write the history books, so they can adjust the facts to suit themselves.  There are many instances of Allied atrocities in WW2 that should have been tried as war crimes.  I am thinking of the conventional bombing of the German city of Dresden, or the firebombing of Japanese cities.  The latter killed a whole lot more people than the atomic bombings at Hiroshima and Nagasaki (better left for some other article).  But a lot of terrible things happen during a war; it’s just distasteful to try to justify them as being necessary for a greater good.  It’s so much more honest to say what is really inside: the enemy is inhuman and we’re  scared sh*tless; we need to kill as many of them as possible before the war ends.  Afterwards,  we have to go back to being human beings and play nice again.  Or whatever passes for “nice” between bellicose nations.

So back to the Wicked Witch of the West.  The play does a good job turning the Oz universe on its head.  As with many revisionist works, there are problems with it, since it changes a couple of  really key points that clash with the world that Frank L. Baum created.  Similar to those Star Wars prequels that cannot exist in the same universe as the original Star Wars movies.  But these are nits, and you can still enjoy the Wicked concept if you ignore them.  Just don’t expect me to change my worldview: The witch is still evil. (Don’t forget, she did try to kill Dorothy.  And her little dog, too.)

  1. What is next?? Darth Vader used to be a nice guy that made some  wrong choices?? [↩]
  2. Except for that other disturbing photo, showing thousands of his dead victims from the concentration camps. [↩]

No Offshore Drilling; where’s my nuclear car??

July 27, 2008 in Humor, Politics, Rants, Technology by bladerunner | 2 comments

Time to set the record straight:  whatever, whichever politician said that gas prices are not coming down was right.  Offshore drilling is a good idea, but it will not bring gas prices down.

Now don’t get me wrong.  I’m all for drilling for oil in our own backyards.  When I first moved out to California, I was enchanted by all of those oil derricks pumping, pumping away in the beautiful hills of Huntington Beach, down along the beach paths and even on the beach dunes themselves.  It made California look like the golden El Dorado that I had always imagined: golden roads lined with cool-looking cars and all of the oil we needed right under our feet.  And yes, I was also expecting bikini-clad girls to pump my gas and sell me my milk from those roadside milk stands (I saw pictures of this put out by the Orange County Chamber of Commerce).  I’m sure the girls and the pumping action of the derricks was some sort of Freudian juxtaposition that made me drive out to California all the faster.

So why don’t I support the drilling now?? Because once the oil is out of the ground, it is immediately put out on the international market where China can bid on it, along with every other gas-thirsty country that is finally making its way out of the Third World.  We would be competing with them for our own gas.  And make no mistake about it: it’s our gas.  It is coming out on nationally-owned areas (offshore or the ANWR in Alaska)  and the oil companies are getting a low-risk, fantastic return on investment.  If that is the case, they can afford to lose a little bit of profit by selling that gas DOMESTICALLY, ONLY.  Does that sound socialistic, the first hints of nationalized gas production?? You bet your sweet light-crude that it does!!  But if you’re going to drill in my backyard, and I own the land and mineral rights, you have better pay me off by at least selling me the oil at a domestically-competitive price.

But I’m also realistic.  Using oil to power our cars is a technological dead-end.  With all of the Chinese, Indian, Polish, Russian, etc. etc.  economies finally coming out of the Dark Ages and increasing the number of privately owned cars, we are going to be running out of oil soon (peak oil production).   So where’s my nuclear-powered car??  If all of those Disney documentaries in the 1950’s promised plenty of energy in the future, how come I have to use my bicycle to go to the library and to the store??

The anwer of course is that we can’t trust the average person to drive a quarter of critical mass around in their engines, waiting for some terrorist to figure out that (4) times (1/4)  equals (1).  Boom.   And I can hardly imagine the bad traffic created when the radioactive cleanup team cleans up the pieces from your average 4 accidents per freeway per day. 

We need to use nuclear power to generate the electricity to provide the hydrogen to run the cars.  Simple enough, please give me my new-model 2010 hydrogen-fueled SUV.  In Earth-Friendly Green,  of course.  And feel free to stick as many oil-sucking straws in the California Offshore until then. 

Musings on The Golden Compass

July 5, 2008 in Film, Rants by bladerunner | 2 comments

Well, it’s no secret that I was not a big fan of the movie “The Golden Compass” even before it came out.   I knew that it was derived from a book of the same name, which was part of a trilogy written by Philip Pullman, a self-described atheist.   There was also the fact that the series is known as His Dark Materials trilogy, and that there was a running thread in the books that was anti-religious.   I don’t have a problem with that, but I did have a problem with God being terminated by the series’ young protagonists in book 3.  Pretty intense stuff for a children’s series.

But there’s a couple of things that merit a revisit to this movie.  One is the fact that I was a big fan of “The Chronicles of Narnia”  which is a series that is an unabashedly pro-Christian allegory1.  I did not want to favor one point of view without giving a chance to its opposite.  There was the fact that I don’t want to dismiss an entire series based on hearsay.  Finally, there’s the fact that Roger Ebert had given the movie 4 stars.   I had to check this movie out.

I recently had the opportunity to view the DVD of the movie recently, and I can see why Mr. Ebert admired its production values; they are exquisite.

silver gallery

The concepts were brilliantly illustrated on the screen, and as Roger writes “As a visual experience, it is superb.”

carriage

But I cannot recommend the movie.  As beautiful as it is to behold, it failed its first test when one of my kids asked me when the movie was going to be over.  This is the equivalent of the dreaded looking-at-your-watch syndrome while watching a movie at the theatre.  Now, I’ve been in movies that are slow moving and require extreme patience, so a measured pace has never bothered me.  My issues with the movie lie elsewhere.

Spoilers follow:

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  1. see my previous article http://www.crackteam.org/2006/04/23/its-obvious-episode-1-narnia-for-dummies/ [↩]

Wall-E in DLP

June 28, 2008 in Film, Technology by bladerunner | 2 comments

Wall-E

Yesterday I braved the crowds and the alarming number of children at the theatre, attending this movie.  Kids at a children’s movie, what a concept.  However, the movie was a real pleasure and definitely worth a viewing.

More importantly, I found myself in a DLP theatre, by mere circumstance.  Wall-E in DLP is a real pleasure, and not to be missed.  Couple that with a very generous admission price of 5.00 before 6PM and I had an all-around great experience.  The theater is located in La Palma, Orange County.  You can find it by going to the DLP website and searching your local area code.  As always, my only gripe is that the theatre does not list the DLP theatre separately from its print counterparts, so you have to call ahead to find out where you need to be before the 6PM bell tolls.  Try DLP, you’ll like it.

I also experienced that rarity: a breakdown in the DLP projector halfway through the movie.  However, I can report that unlike the days of old, the system reboot only took a few seconds; no need to bring up the houselights while the white-clad team of   repairmen descended on the clean room housing the projector.   The movie continued and I can report that it’s worth your time.

I’ll let someone else with a good graphics background report on the movie itself.  I am only an awe-struck theatre-goer that appreciates quality work.

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I Hate Diablo Cody

March 22, 2008 in Film, Rants by bladerunner | No comments

Boy do I hate Diablo Cody, the screenwriter.  But this is going to be a long-term project, for she does seem to have some talent.  It’s a backhanded compliment; just take it, as it is the best I can do.  And please notice that I recognize her as a screenwriter.

She had a great debut with the screenplay for the movie “Juno”  –a movie that I fully intended to dislike–  and the Hollywood community agreed by giving her the Oscar this year.  The movie was not too bad, a lot better than I expected, and I went in with totally negative expectations.  Her future output should be rather good and if the quality stays constant she’ll do great.

But I hate her new name, Diablo Cody.  It smacks of pretention; you could have done better, Diablo Cody. If you wanted to make a statement and have your work speak for you, I would have chosen a name like Jane Smith or better yet, Jane Doe Smith.  It would have been a hoot to see a Jane Smith walk up to the podium to accept the Oscar, dressed in the nouveau-goth attire and sporting that annoying, gigantic tattoo that screams “Notice Me !!”  That would have been ballsy.

But you took the easy way out and stayed in your post-stripper mentality, choosing a moniker that screams “Attitude entering the room”  I really resent your presenting the stripper world as the ninth level of Hell On Earth; if you’d come up through the world of coal-mining in Virginia I would have a little more sympathy.  As it is, you made your living through the habits of needy, creepy men (present company excepted)  that frequent strip bars.  Not really the noblest profession on earth.  So saying that you’ve paid your dues sounds rather hollow.

But I’m only one person and this is just my opinion.  After you produce a few more outstanding screenplays,  I will probably forgive you and forget this piece.  But you’ll always be Jane Smith in my heart.

I miss 800.com

November 4, 2007 in Everything Else by bladerunner | No comments

As I get older, some recent world history starts seeming like ancient history.This is not a good thing.I date myself when I recall programming with punch cards, real-to-goodness pieces of paper with little holes in them. I date myself when I say that I miss the sound of my old LPs playing on a phonograph. And I am dating myself when I long for those brave pioneers of the early Internet Commerce Experiment (ICE): 800.comI still remember when the world of electronic commerce offered untold riches to anyone who was willing to dream up a new enterprise and pay outrageous sums to web developers to make it a WWW reality. There were offers galore from all sorts of outfits; I naturally gravitated to those offering cheap and discounted DVDs. Don’t forget that we early DVD adopters had to pay upwards of 20.00 for each of our shiny movie discs (my most expensive DVD purchase was 21.99; I paid that for the “Lost in Space” movie DVD which included –wonder of wonders– two commentaries and tons of supplementary material. Wow. I recently saw that very same disc in the discount bin at Fry’s Electronics for 4.99. Wow. )

So I spent my early surfing days looking for discounted and free DVDs. I found 800.com to be a good place for price and selection. Their first sale was 3 DVDs for 1.00 and I quickly took them up on their offer. Yet there was a better draw on their site: they had a film blog and weekly writing contests for free DVDs. I could tell that they loved film and I envied their adventure into online commerce. What could go wrong with selling the films you admired and rewarding good writing from your customers??

Alas, 800.com is no more. They were victims of the Disastrous Internet Bubble Burst (DIBB) and went the way of the dodo, along with Pets.com eToys.com and other worthy endeavours. But I was lucky/talented/geeky enough to win a couple of their contests.� Here are some of my entries, see if you can guess which ones won prizes.

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Apple TV: crap in a lacquer box.

April 6, 2007 in Rants, Technology, Television by bladerunner | 1 comment

The rollout of the Apple TV Appliance reminds me of a story I heard when I was a kid. It involved a man from ancient Segovia buying a donkey for his farm in Spain. He bought this highly adorned donkey for an exorbitant amount and was proudly walking it home. When he started taking off the embroidered tackle, he found the unpleasant truth: the beautiful epaulets and head-dress were hiding sightless eyes, the elaborate tassels that reached to the floor were hiding the infection in the rear legs, and the lacquered and shiny saddle was hiding a lame back on the animal.

In the same way, I hope people are not deceived by the beautiful Apple design and ergonomic, logical menus. I hope that they get to examine the crappy video image before they buy. This device succeeds in *downgrading* all image sources to make them easily available anywhere in your house. Wow.

If it’s too late and you’ve already been screwed, go ahead and use the amazing human ability to justify our mistakes. We are really good at this, gauging from the various studies that�show that our satisfaction with a crappy product decreases markedly at first and then actually increases after purchase. I think it’s our attempt to justify our mistakes and say to the world “it’s not really all that bad if you consider……” Same behavior applies to poorly conceived marriages. Be aware; beware. ��

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SuperBowl for Dummies: Magnetic Moon Boots

February 7, 2007 in Rants, Television by bladerunner | 6 comments

Some time ago, a survey was conducted to show the poor state of science education among the American Public. They asked the man-on-the-street: If you were on the moon right now, would you be standing on the surface or floating above it??? A large percentage (I forget how many) said ‘floating’ as the answer.

I think most of our CT audience knows the real answer: there is gravity on the moon, so you’d be ’standing’ on the surface.

When the survey showed the man-on-the-streets pictures of the man-on-the-moon astronauts ’standing’ on the surface, a second question was asked: “How is this possible??” The public came up with the classic answer: They are wearing magnetic boots.

Which brings me back to the SuperBowl FedEx advertisement showing an office on the moon, with paper and supplies (and even a dog) floating around. When the scene moves outdoors, we see astronauts ’standing’ on the surface. Sorry folks, you can’t have it both ways. To add insult to injury, one of the astronauts then ‘jumps’ off the surface of the moon into space !!! You need a really low microgravity condition (such as is found on a relatively small asteroid) to do something like that .

I worry for the future of America. Or at least the future of the SuperBowl commercial.

It’s Obvious, Episode 5: Apocalypto

January 28, 2007 in Film by bladerunner | 1 comment

Several people have praised this movie to me, yet they added the postscript: What is the movie about?? Without giving anything away, let me point you to the Will Durant quote that opens the movie:

“A great Civilization is not conquered from without until it has destroyed itself from within.”

Some movies give it all up in the title; I’m thinking ‘Snakes on a Plane’ and ‘Free Willie’ for starters. You know there are snakes on an aircraft and you know Willie will go free. Oops. I hope I didn’t spoil that classic movie for you by giving you the ending. And yet there was enough doubt about the outcome to engender a “Free Willie 2″ and “Free Willie: the Revenge” : )

So let’s go back to the name of the movie: Apocalypto. This brings up all sorts of end-of-the-world images and references the book of the Apocalypse in the Bible (also known as the Book of Revelations) which recounts all sorts of bloody battles and the final match between Good and Evil in the history of humanity. So you know something cataclysmic will take place, and also that established cultures will meet and clash. That’s all I’m saying before I head into the spoilers that follow……

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Stephanie Edwards: Dig Dagger and Twist

January 1, 2007 in Everything Else, Rants, Television by bladerunner | 3 comments

The topic of the Pasadena Rose Parade is far afield from the fare on the CrackTeam (CT) website. But I think there are enough mitigating circumstances to include the Parade in our website this year: George Lucas is the Grand Marshall, Star Wars floats on the road, 501st Stormtrooper garrison marching, CT members working just a couple of blocks from the parade route, Pasadena JPL and its role in the birth of CT, etc. etc.

I have to address one of the cruelest moments in the parade. No, it was not the disgraceful sight of Darth Vader ambling down the street waving at the crowds. Embarrassing. The Lord of the Sith should have more comtempt for the crowds; perhaps he could have pelted them with LucasFilm (TM) merchandise and completed the spectacle.

No, the cruelest moment was the comment made by Bob Eubanks while the U.S. Marine Mounted Color Guard was parading for the cameras. He mentioned that the horses are periodically retired, much like “aging commentators on TV.” He was of course referring to the absence of Stephanie Edwards from the coverage this year. Stephanie is a victim of the ol’ double standard: guys age gracefully and look more distinguished, gals just age. She was probably also experiencing the Star Trek Maxim: a new series (TNG, DS9, Voyager, Enterprise) comes up every few years because the more established actors get paid lots more and expect the salaries to keep on going up every year with a successful series. Stephanie and Bob are probably very expensive to keep, and that’s the first place you cut (according to management).
But this is a prime example of management “not having a clue.” In TV-Land you are supposed to extract as much viewer interest as you can, for the money you are spending. I would have done a couple of “Farewell” type broadcasts and engaged the audience in that way. Having Stephanie say her goodbyes last year in the pouring rain was just NOT the way to do it. And the bad blood between KTLA and the viewers is not a good thing.

But perhaps Bob was referring to the fact that his option is coming due soon, and that perhaps he would also be let go. That would be a shame. He and Stephanie were a fixture on New Years Day morning and should be accorded some respect. But I’m sure he’ll get the Fond Farewell option (accompanying harp strings and wavering video effects, please).

One final note to KTLA management: if you want to bring the viewers in, please feel free to manipulate us. A “Final Farewell” broadcast with the old commentators would be a ratings hit. And I’d be the first dupe watching. For now, I recommend the ABC local broadcast feed; it’s the best HD feed after the KTLA offering.

It’s Obvious, Episode 4: The Fountain

December 12, 2006 in Film by bladerunner | 1 comment

This movie will most likely become a classic, in the league of 2001:A Space Odyssey. Not as effective as that cinematic milestone, but just as ambitious. It is also just as confusing: this is a good thing. Aronofsky has given us another tour-de-force, just as intense as “Pi” and “Requiem for a Dream” but centered around a love story.

I am going to discuss a few obvious religious symbols in the movie, and will leave it at that. You should go see it and decide what it all means to you.

Spoilers follow……….

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007 musings

November 19, 2006 in Film by bladerunner | 2 comments

I just went to see the new Bond flick, “Casino Royale.” I won’t be talking about the movie at this time since it is really awkward to write while keeping the ‘no spoilers’ rule. Too complicated. However, as a new actor takes over the James Bond role, it is a good time to ponder what has come before. In honor of the new movie, I have gathered a few choice moments from the 007 pantheon and included them below. If you have better alternative film moments (and given my faulty memory, it is inevitable), please send them to me and I’ll include them in the main piece below. With due attribution of course.

Most cruel moment: James Bond was written with a streak of cruelty in his personality. Or perhaps Sean Connery was just working out his kinks onscreen. For whatever reason, 007 was given a really ultra-cool, nasty disposition early on.

Connery: In “Dr. No” Bond breaks away from his game of solitaire just long enough to kill the good doctor that’s just pumped 6 bullets into an unfortunate pillow standing in for our hero in bed. Bond dryly remarks “you’ve had your 6″ and then shoots the doctor with his Walther PPK.

Moore: Roger Moore was such a nice guy that it is hard to believe he would fit this category. But check out the “For Your Eyes Only” moment in which he kicks the villain’s car off a cliff. He really meant it that time: there was no funny quip following this action.

Brosnan: I don’t have an entry here. Any help??

Dalton: The entire “License Renewed” showed 007 in a mad rage to get personal revenge. I am sure there is a pivotal moment in this movie that showed his cruelty. I just can’t think of one.

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It’s Obvious, Episode 3: Casablanca for Dummies

October 28, 2006 in Film by bladerunner | 2 comments

Yes, it’s high time to discuss that most-kept of secrets. There’s more in Casablanca that meets the eye. This is another chapter in the series of “It’s Obvious…” film articles that started with the following entries:

Episode 1. It’s Obvious, Narnia

Episode 2. It’s Obvious, 2001

In this entry, I will discuss the high possibility that the main character in that most respected of film classics, Casablanca, was quite gay. Yes you heard it right. The character played by that most admired of macho actors, Humphrey Bogart, was as gay as Hollywood could dare to write in the high-suspicion environment of post-World-War-II America. I personally am just “shocked, shocked” that this revelation was not caught, expounded, denounced or cherished in such outre documentaries like “Out of the Closet Hollywood.” Oh well, perhaps they can add a small segment to the DVD release and credit me, bladerunner at CrackTeam.org, for this insight.

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Great Concert..at your house!!

October 18, 2006 in Film, Music by bladerunner | No comments

This is unusual for me; I never write about music. That is probably because all of the composers on my playlist have been dead for hundreds of years (Mozart is 250 this year, woo-hoo!) and my pop music tastes tend to be Beatles-bland. The less said about it, the better.

But some days ago I attended a cool concert at a friends house. The venue was intimate 45 people or lessand the artist was new to me. Bob Bennett is a well-known Christian guitar player, and his folksy ballads are what I remember about that evening gathering. The guitar was expertly and sweetly played (again, I dont know enough music-related adjectives to give a good description) but the real draw were the vivid lyrics and sheer poetry of his work. Hmmm. I have heard the phrase dulcet tones used, but I dont know if it applies to the vigorous work that Bob Bennett performed that night.

Also included:our evening is graced by an iconic film actor who just happens to play a mean guitar…..

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“It’s Obvious” Episode 2: 2001 for Dummies

May 21, 2006 in Film by bladerunner | 2 comments

This is beyond any doubt, the greatest movie ever made. If we pitiful hominids are to leave something of value behind us to demonstrate our collective genius (after the Solar System explodes), a copy of this movie would qualify. It was made in 1968 and has not aged a day. You could view it today and its vision of Mankind’s future in space and beyond would stand up to scrutiny.

The spoilers will follow; if you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favor and watch the DVD until you can get to the Cinerama Dome for a big-screen showing (they have them every other year). And don’t forget to sit in the very front row, center seat at the theatre; you’ll be immersed in a psychedelic journey beyond your wildest CGI-addled dreams.

PS. When I talk about the Monolith I am referring to that big, black, rectangular piece of ebony artwork that makes an appearance throughout the film. And yes, I’ve seen the Monolith written with a capital “M” for reasons that will appear in the review that follows.l
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It’s obvious. Episode 1: “Narnia for Dummies”

April 23, 2006 in Film by bladerunner | No comments

Living in a world that constantly occupies and stimulates our minds
with color, sound, action, motion, etc. it occurs to me that many of
the truly obvious things in life are not being captured, stored in
our organic, transitory brains (What *does* happen after the brain
decomposes?? Where do the stored memories and abilities go?? I’ll
address that in a future thread). There are so many obvious truths that
have been learned, discovered, realized by CT members that is seems a
shame to let them go to waste into the thoughtless void of oblivion.

Which is why I am starting this series of ‘obvious’ articles. Given
my preferences, I’ll start with obvious movie facts. Mind you, these
are not opinions; these are facts which have been backed by the combined
might of the human mind and endeavour. If you haven’t heard of them yet,
then you are the perfect subject for the ‘…for Dummies’ series.

Since these articles may be full of spoilers, I will give fair warning of the
spoilers to come. Let’s start with the very popular “Chronicles of Narnia:
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe.” If you have not seen it yet, it is now
available on DVD. Purchase the 2-disc set and avoid the movie-only set. You
will be very pleased.

[spoilers follow]
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Team Comparison

March 19, 2006 in About, Humor by bladerunner | 8 comments

A little dated, but here is a matrix that says it all (circa 1997).
All references to “Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension” are duly trademarked.

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Groundhog Day Factoids

February 3, 2006 in Everything Else by bladerunner | 4 comments

In honor of my old team lead, the most revered GroundHog prognosticator, seer and fan.
He holds a Groundhog lunch (tasty!) every year and was a great boss to work for.

And kudos to Pat Chang, who learned to play the piano at age 45 after
watching this movie; it’s never too late to live.

Groundhog Day (1993) was an exceptional motion picture.

Punxsutawney, PA founded in 1850s
Population 6800 (or 6782 in the movie)
Named after Ponkies or “sand flies” in area.
Celebration began as religious Candlemas Day.
First GroundHog Day celebration 1886
First celebration at Gobbler’s Knob, 1887

Phil sees shadow -> six more weeks of winter
Phil was named after King Phillip.
Phil previously known as Bre’r Groundhog
Phil is cared for by the gentlemen of the Inner Circle.

Groundhog nomenclature is Marmota Monax, order Rodentia
Groundhog lifespan is 6-8 years.
Baby Groundhog is a kit/cub.
Average groundhog weighs 15 lbs, 20 inches long.

Poor Phil Connors relives Groundhog day, everyday at 6:00AM
He wakes up to “I’ve got you, babe” from Sonny and Cher

Movie directed by Harold Ramis
Movie actually filmed in Woodstock, Ill.
Best diner in town is the Tip Top Cafe.
Movie playing in town, everyday, is “Heidi II”
Phil likes to be called ‘Bronco’ when wearing a serape to the movies.
Nancy Taylor is from Lincoln High, Pittsburg. Mrs. Walsh’s English class.
She makes chipmunk noises at the most intimate of times.
Robin Duke plays Doris the waitress.
Ned Ryerson is Phil’s insurance-selling school pal.

Phil Connors works for WPBH channel 9, Pittsburg.
He’s a weatherman.
George Fenton and director co-wrote theme song “Weatherman”
And surely Phil got pretty sick of hearing the “Pennsylvania Polka!”

Larry drives the TV van.
Rita produces the TV news segment.
Rita’s favorite ice cream is Rocky Road. And she hates fudge.
Rita’s favorite drink is “Sweet Vermouth on the rocks w/twist”
Rita majored in 19th century French Poetry (what a waste!)
Phils pays $1000 for each of his piano lessons.
Phil plays “Rachmaninoff’s variation on Theme from Paganini” at the party.
Bill Murray actually learned to play that *one* piece for the movie.

A lot of male viewers report this as a “life-changing” movie.
A lot of female viewers wonder what’s wrong with the male viewers.

[NOTE: This author has plans to learn to play the piano in the near future.]

I had a dream….

January 17, 2006 in Politics by bladerunner | 3 comments

In honor of Dr. Martin Luther King’s birthday, I borrowed Futureman’s time spinner and took it out for a walk……
The Traveler.

I had been walking since early this morning. It’s tough to get around when you don’t have a car; I could have tried to rent one but it would have started people asking too many questions to which I didn’t really have answers. None that they would have understood, anyway.

Instead, I kept on the backroads mostly, trying not to draw too much attention. My shoes weren’t made for walking on this semi-dirt road that I was using, and I would have stood out like a sore thumb if I’d shuffled down the main highway just a few yards away. The dirt and dust had started working their way into my socks, and it really sucked.

The heat of the day was starting to get to me, and the comical hat I’d made out of discarded newspaper was not helping too much. Funny how people stopped using hats; you see them everywhere in the old films and newsreels. People even wore them to the baseball game. Strange. It would have been easier if I had been traveling up North in the Empire or Garden States. But I was now making my way down some God-forsaken road in the Peach State. Georgia was definitely in my mind. And inside of my dusty shoes and sweaty socks.

Up ahead I spied salvation in the form of a diner. I couldn’t miss the gorgeous curves of the roof or the efficient use of space in that old trailer that was now serving as a diner. It looked like it had just driven up the road and broken down at this spot in the woods. And now it was serving burgers and leaking all sorts of delicious smells into the air. I trudged up to the door and went inside.

The air was cool and the smells warm and inviting. This old wreck must have some primitive air conditioning unit chugging smoke out in back and I hoped that it wouldn’t break down until after I’d had some lunch. Some old coot was greasing down the grill and talking to himself. He looked like your typical movie cook and I half-expected to see an anchor tattooed on his arm. Maybe I should have called out “Cookie” to see if he turned my way. I was afraid to make him move; the ash on the cigarette dangling from his lips was pretty long and I certainly did not want it spicing up my food.

The booths were all empty as were the barstools. The old coot and this old heap of a diner should have broken down nearer to the main highway; he would have more customers that way. In any case, I sidled up to the counter, put down my backpack and started checking out the eats and drinks. First thing I noticed at once was the clean smell of PineSol; it really got my appetite going. There was a nice fresh-made apple pie under glass right in front of me, and I just knew there were ice-cold Cokes (in glass bottles!) cooling their heels in a hidden icebox, somewhere. Just waiting for me to finish that tasty burger, of course.

And then the old coot spoke.

“Hey boy, you can’t eat here.” The words were mechanical and I took a couple of seconds to parse them out. He was probably too tired to continue talking, so he half-heartedly pointed to a grungy sign on the wall: “Whites only.” I had seen pictures of this sign, and they all looked as dirty as this particular sign now in front of me. The historian in me was fascinated by this whole scenario playing out right NOW in real time in a forgotten part of the world. The good man in my should have been outraged at this injustice. The hungry man in me just wanted a piece of that pie and a cold Coke.

It must have been 30 seconds before I started thinking again. An Eternity staring at the old coot. Now I noticed that his eyes were tired and that he looked a lot like a grandfather I once had. His voice was firm but his eyes were weak and he seemed exhausted by the whole charade. I think if we’d had a chance to switch places, he would have taken that opportunity and walked out of that place. But he had his place and apparently, I had mine. I just shrugged, picked up my backpack and walked out the door.

The sun was still out but now I felt cold. It poured down on my head and neck and burned the exposed black skin on my hands. Time to go back home, if I could find a way.

Creation or Evolution? The Kaleidoscope.

December 26, 2005 in Everything Else by bladerunner | 15 comments

OK. Here it is in as short a manner as I can manage: the Truth behind the whole silly argument. Well, it?s actually only my opinion, but it reflects both the hard science in my engineering brain as well as the Godly love that I feel in my heart. As I see this fight playing out on the nightly news, I lean back and wonder what the fuss is all about. What if everyone is right?

Start with a kaleidoscope. You played with it as a child; it was a single cardboard tube with a mirrored insert, plus assorted plastic beads and colored glass bits that produced complex patterns as you rotated the tube and looked through one end of it. As you kept on rotating the tube up to the light you delighted in the unique, non-repeating patterns that you observed.

Now think of the Universe as God’s kaleidoscope. He puts in a ton of hydrogen and free energy and starts rotating the tube. Fusion ensues in the hydrogen eddies pooling in some gravimetric nooks and crannies of space and starts producing the heavier elements and eventual carbon that coalesces into the known worlds and you and me. The amino acid laden primordial soup that created life was but a stage in this turning of the tube. The background radiation that resulted from all the burning plasma in the Universe and which jump-starts the initial combinatorial changes in the chromosomal pool is just another bit of plastic and glass that resided in the tube.

And the continuing evolution of Earthly life in its many forms is just a pleasing pattern of Creation that was started so long ago.

Did God create the tube? Definitely. Can you explain where all the matter and the initial energetic deposit came from, otherwise? And it was a pretty large deposit, too. Does God know that we were coming when the kaleidoscope was put together and started turning? Definitely; that?s one disadvantage of omniscience, you can never be surprised by the Future.

So what is the point of this exercise, this eons-long turning of a cardboard tube? It is pleasing to God and He derives the greatest measure of satisfaction from it (I also enjoy watching crystals grow, but I certainly don?t have the patience for a longer endeavour). But unlike a child watching the ants crawling around in the Ant Farm?, the Creator interacts with His Creation and knows the name of His creatures. We are not pets, but part of the Creator?s family and given part of the family inheritance. Does this violate the Star Trek non-interference rule? I don?t know that God would limit himself to the laws of nature and physics that He himself created. He decided in which direction Time?s Arrow would point, and He can change the infinitesimal characteristics of the tube?s contents when He desires.

So to answer the burning question: Creation or Evolution? I can say ?both.? One does not deny the other. We can acknowledge the mechanism and the Creator of the mechanism. To those that propose the randomness of the process I can only say: It?s random because our small minds cannot grasp the larger pattern. If we had a fast enough computer and limitless storage memory, we could predict tomorrow?s weather. God?s memory is large enough to hold and to view and influence the eventual fate of His Creation.

Ink and the Free Market

November 20, 2005 in Rants, Technology by bladerunner | 2 comments

Yes, we all know that the Free Market (ie: Capitalism) works. Most of us are old enough to have seen the Berlin Wall being torn down in the mid-80s as Communism took a deathly blow. And some of us may even have been old enough to see the Wall being put up by Nikita Khrushchev after the Cold War confrontations of the dangerous and turbulent 50’s. Yes, there was more to the 50’s than sock-hops and drive-in burger joints, although that is what comes to mind when I hear that decade mentioned. The Free Market gave us those, too.

The Free Market is both the problem and the answer. Any opportune and open niche is available for any individual, honest or dishonest, to fill. And to make a fortune doing so; that is how the Market works. We have to keep score on success and failure somehow, and money is a nice way to do so. It can be counted, after all.

Which brings me back to my original thought: why do I have to pay through the nose everytime I have to buy a new ink cartridge for my printer? It seems that before I have a chance to print my dissertation on the true Secret of the Universe on crisp white paper and using crisp black inkjet lettering, my family has used up all of the ink in the cartridge to print out the latest reams and reams of useless Internet information. Information that could be looked up at any time, mind you. It must be that paper gives the information a sense of permanence, at least until we toss the paper into the recycler. What is not in permanent evidence, however, are the rolls of bills that leave my wallet in ever-increasing numbers, as I pay for more and more ink cartridges to keep my printer functioning.

The Free Market gave us inkjet printing. Someone spent some capital dough in researching the technology and making it available to us consumers. And I for one don’t mind paying for the research that went into making it possible to get great printing on my desktop, in crisp black and white or in vibrant colors. But even I have a limit, and paying 29.00 for an ink cartridge is too much. It’s like those tolls in the New York bridges: they were initially there to recoup the cost of the structure, but they have been kept around as a revenue source long after the initial debt was repaid. I think we’ve paid enough for the cost of the technology (deep, deep down in the bottom of my heart, I feel this is true); corporations are now just squeezing us for profit (I also have proof of this; it is lying in some never-read pile of Internet printouts in a recycle bin).

Corporations also try to hook us into the inkjet habit early. They provide free printers to us at the drop of a hat; one free printer for a purchase of a computer, a free printer for the purchase of a hard-drive, a free printer with the purchase of a free printer (eg: customer must pay sales tax on this free offer!). Each free printer comes with a handy set of black and color ink cartridges which will give us a great printing experience. At least until the ink runs out. It’s like a dealer hooking you to heroin or cocaine with free samples. Both operate with the same amount of disregard for the junkie, the consumer.

I have tried refilling my ink cartridges, and that worked great for awhile. It was a cheap alternative if you did not mind the mess of working with ink and getting your finger stained a bit. The Free Market had provided an alternative for the consumer, and made someone rich by selling cartridge refilling kits. But then the ink cartridge manufacturers started placing circuit board chips on the cartridge to interact with the printer and stop printing at some “optimal” time before the ink ran out; this prevented users from refilling their cartridges. The text I read in the printer manual said that this was to provide a “quality printing experience” to the consumer. I guess prison rape could semanthically be called an “optimal bonding experience” in the same manner.

But the final laugh belongs to us, the consumers. Free Market incentives encouraged someone to create a chip-resetter for your ink cartridge, so that you can re-program your chip and continue to refill your cartridges. I have made use of this device and have been able to refill my cartridges easily and without much of a mess. The cost to me: about 2.00 per refill.

The Free Market offers financial rewards to those willing to do the research and also to those who are willing to stand up for their rights.

Tomorrow is Yesterday

November 9, 2005 in Music, Technology by bladerunner

The title sounds like a good name for a Star Trek episode. Wait, it is. Oh well, it still captures my theme for this message: that some of the answers to our current-day dilemmas can be found in the technology of the past. Case in point: the Digisette MP3 cassette player. Better than your iPod, let me explain.

I still remember the days of the big debate between two different types of automobile CD-changers. Some folks preferred the type which mounted in your trunk and would beam the sound to your FM radio. “No fuss, no wiring muss” was the battle cry. You could just plop this product in your car and it would work instantly. Instantly, through your dopey, static-filled radio. Audiophiles rightly decried this monstrosity and preferred the wired models. Sure, they were a hassle to install, but they delivered crisp sound to your speakers, sound that was carried on shining, 12 gauge copper wire. The difference was apparent to any ear, whether refined or not.

Which brings me back to the current dilemma facing iPod owners: you now own a device that carries your entire collection of music (and more), but you can’t easily play it in your car without using an FM transmitter or some sort of cassette adapter plugged into your car radio. Either of those solution introduces a tangle of wires and a headache both aesthetic and operational. Do you dare risk a car accident while trying to find your favorite music or trying to reach your windshield wiper controls over a tangle of wires?? And how about the poor quality of FM-transmitted music ?? How easily the masses forego the high quality of car stereo sound by selling their souls to the ever-increasing capacity of the iPods of this world !

The elegant solution to this dilemma lies in a product from the past, one of the first breed of MP3 players which is now, sadly defunct. The Digisette MP3 player looks like a tape cassette that has been dipped in aluminum alloy. It is heavier than its analog cousin because its innards contain a fully workable MP3 player and a tiny amount of flash memory. Add a MMC memory card (a totally redundant name!) and you have yourself a bit less of 1Gig of memory for the road. And I do mean “for the road.” Pop this baby in your cassette player, and you have yourself a good 10-hours or equivalent CD capacity, easily accessible through your player’s FF and REW buttons. Elegant. The player pops into your cassette player (out of sight, out of mind) without a single wire in sight. And the sound: it is played directly to your car stereo’s cassette playback head. It is wonderful. If you wish to walk away from the car, you can always pop this beauty into the belt-clip holder provided with the player and plug-in your favorite headphones for a similar, portable sound experience.

Sure, the memory does not allow you to carry the Virgin Records library in your pocket. But the provided PC interface allows you load up a gaggle of MMC cards with your favorite tunes for a swappable library of surprising capacity. I use mine to listen to hours and hours of podcast material in my car; it is an invaluable ally against the poor FM reception I encounter on my way between Orange and San Diego counties.

Good luck trying to find this beautifully designed and amazingly geeky technical wonder. Although it fits my needs (and probably yours) to the fullest, it does not fit with the model that Steve Jobs and all of the iPod copycats are foisting on you: “Bigger is Better.” Don’t believe them. Size does NOT matter when you can’t use it where it counts the most: in the back of your car. The Digisette may be small, but that is its charm. It can do the job you really need, not the one you think you need. And it looks right at home in your car cassette deck. Just remember to buy a couple of spare batteries for it; you may be listening to it for hours and hours on end…….

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A Passion for Christ

March 3, 2004 in Film by bladerunner | 1 comment

The film “The Passion of the Christ” has become an event-movie, much
like a hot Hollywood franchise (eg: Star Wars, The Matrix, Lord of the
Rings). As such, I can’t wait for the sequel (I’ll explain in a second).

Many viewers at the showing I attended last week were the devout, like the
elderly ladies in wheelchairs with oxygen tanks and masks. They probably
don’t go to the movies as much as I do, and this movie was an event that they could not resist. Other viewers were the curious, people that are trying to
measure their strong stomachs against 2 hours of purported blood-letting and
torture. Finally, there were the skeptics. It’s all over the news that this movie
is a piece of anti-semitic propaganda, made injudiciously at best, or maliciously
at worst. That final group of viewers were here to verify for themselves
the truth of these charges.

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