Card is right on several points. He does an excellent job pointing out the similarities between Ender’s Game and Harry Potter, which reminded me of Harry Potter vs. Star Wars.

However, he seems so upset about JKR’s actions that he undermines his own agenda. Bringing up the Stouffer lawsuit diminishes his case, as 2 minutes of research shows it is without much merit. For one, the character Larry Potter is not, as he claims, in the Muggles book.

He also speculates on her motives rather unfavorably. I’m wondering if he had space to fill, or was just pissed off and rambling. If he kept his tone a bit more civil it would have made a more convincing argument. If I were to speculate, I’d say that as a literature snob himself (OSC almost got a doctorate in English lit.), he’s a tad peeved that JKR was so successful with her “subliterature”.

What he doesn’t bring up is that Rowling has stated that she wants to do a Harry Potter encyclopedia¹. If the Lexicon was done well enough, it could potentially cut into her sales (although with a 10K print run it’d be like a fly buzzing around a cow). I agree that for publicity’s sake, she shouldn’t have sued. She does look rather greedy given her target.

For the record, I think Ender’s Game is one of the best sci fi books in the last 30 years, and the Harry Potter series is pure joy.

1. Which I wrote about here, but it does contain Book 7 spoilers

This sounds strikingly similar to William Gibson’s take on prostitution in the Sprawl Trilogy¹. The character Molly Millions once worked as a prostitute, but brothels temporarily imprint a new consciousness on working girls and wipe the memories when it’s over. This very neatly allows all parties to go about guiltless, unless you wake up in the middle of a bad session like Molly does. Then things are not so good.

Ok, that’s just speculation on my part, but tons of people have borrowed from William Gibson. I mean, he coined the terms matrix and cyberspace - the man is a legend.

In Dollhouse, the people (victims?) are given a child-like personality in between gigs. That sounds a lot like Michael Bay’s The Island. Let’s hope Dollhouse is a lot more like the works of William Gibson and less like those of Michael Bay.

Either way, I’m happy it will star the lovely Eliza Dushku.

1. Which comprises Neuromancer, Count Zero, and Mona Lisa Overdrive, and is preceded by the short story collection Burning Chrome. My memory is a little fuzzy, so it may be from Buring Chrome, which includes Johnny Mnemonic.

Bones will be played by Karl Urban. This is the first severe departure as Karl has mainly played big tough guys in Doom, Bourne Supremacy, The Chronicles of Riddick, Lord of the Rings, even Xena. When you think of Bones, you don’t actually picture a guy who could crush your bones:

Sulu will be played by John Cho, aka Harold from Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle. He’s also the guy who introduced us to the term MILF in American Pie. But I don’t think he’s responsible for MILF Hunter. Anyway, not too big of a stretch. The real disappointment is that H&K2 won’t take place in Amsterdam. Lame.

Spock will be played by Zachary Quinto, Sylar from Heroes. Sylar is pretty emotionless, so he’s got practice, but I won’t be able to stop wondering when he’ll bash an alien in the head and steal its powers.

Scotty will be played by Simon Pegg. You of course remember him as Shaun of the Dead, and the super cop from Hot Fuzz. (If you didn’t see it, BTW, Hot Fuzz was awesome.) My first ignorant thought was, “But he’s not Scottish!” Then I remembered James Doohan was Canadian and faked the accent. This is my favorite casting; Simon Pegg kicks ass.

Well, everyone else is an unknown, except for Eric Bana who plays Nero. I’m assuming that’s the bad guy. He’s probably an alien gambler who turns into an unstoppable green monster when he loses money. And it looks like Nimoy will make an appearance as Old Spock. But I’m rather concerned, because I think Shatner is practically irreplaceable. It just occurred to me that Kirk is about as hard to cast as Batman. And by that logic, Christian Bale is the only choice to play him. If you can make an awesome Batman (best ever!), you can make an awesome Kirk. I just wish Abrams had asked me before he picked some random dude.

It’s written by Stephen Moffat who brought us Coupling, which I loved until the character Jeff left; then it just wasn’t the same. Jekyll also features Gina Bellman, who played Jane.

Jekyll is nothing like Coupling, however. As you probably guessed from the name, it’s a modern retelling of the Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde story. It has the feel of a thriller/conspiracy piece, albeit with some funny lines thrown in (and the ridiculously conspicuous black vans are unintentionally hilarious).

Anyway, it’s rather entertaining so far, even though I think Americans are getting made fun of a bit through the token American character (who I’m pretty sure is a Brit doing an American accent). I’ve only seen 2 episodes, but it looks like there are only 6 and no word of a second season. So think of it as a good miniseries, something to help kill time during the summer months and keep you safe from exercise.

If you’re hung up on Uma Thurman (and I know some of you are), you can get the jacket she wore in Kill Bill. They also have Neo’s coat from The Matrix, which looks really cool, but I’m concerned about the response I’d get if I tried to wear it. “Holy shit! Agent Smith ate Neo and stole his coat! You’re dead, you fuckin’ coat stealer!” pummel pummel pummel

No, they’ve got exactly one coat that I could pull off. Search your feelings, you know it to be true.

Even better looking is Altaira, played by Anne Francis . The 50’s were a great time for objectifying women, and Anne Francis was definitely worth the effort. She runs around the entire movie in ultra-flimsy micro-miniskirts and bare feet, pretty much just like the photo (although her hair is much blonder int the film). In fact, according to Wikipedia, she helped launch the miniskirt craze. It’s no stretch that Commander Adams (Leslie Nielsen) and his crew (all male, average age 24.6) are comically falling for Anne’s naive character. Nielsen, who’s almost unrecognizable to someone who knows him from his Naked Gun films created 30+ years later, does a good job, although we heard he wanted to play it cooler but the producers were against it.

And, of course, there’s the iconic Robby the Robot. Robby was built for Forbidden Planet, but has made many appearances in film, TV, and commercials since then. He also has the best line in the film, delivered when Altaira complains he took too long to arrive when she called him:

Sorry miss, I was giving myself an oil job.